Go Forth and Be Funny, part I

Lo, and the Lord said unto Reuben, “Go forth and create a blog. Make it bountiful with the pungent droppings of your mind. Be thoughtful and outspoken, for you are quick of wit and low of morals. Speak out unto the downtrodden bloggers, for they are weary: the Bored, the Emo, the Sleepless, the Drunk, and the Unwitting who accidentally clicked the link in your profile. Berate them with your opinions, for the blog shall act as your soapbox and your posts as your megaphone. So sayeth the Lord.”

And Reuben replied, “Listen, voice in my head; I cannot do as you command. I am but a sober college student lost in the hills of Athens, Ohio. How shall I raise my voice when I perform my stand up comedy on Friday nights at the #2 party school in the nation?”

And the Lord said, “Quit your bitchin’! Jeez, all I want you to do is start a comedy blog. What the hell is your problem? Honestly, shut the fuck up and write some damn comedy!”

And it was good.